Tips for Single Mom : 5 Steps for Creating a Budget You Can Stick To

Yesterday I was wrote about “How to Save Money as A Single Parent” and now I kind of like it to share my financial tips for single parent. Is because I want to remind myself more than others, but if it can help others moving forward from my blog, it would be a delightful to know it.

Developing a budget can do more than track your spending and savings. This article coming from a book made by Michele Cagan, CPA and Elisabeth Lariviere, were it can also help you work toward your financial goals. The following steps will show you how to build a budget that works for your life, so you don’t have to worry about falling short of your plans. And for a single parent this steps could help you to do financial plan for your babies future.

1. Start with your goals

Write down your financial goals. Be sure to include actual dollar amounts and time frames to make tracking possible. For example, measurable goals would be “Have a $1,000 emergency fund by April 1” and “Pay off $5,000 credit card debt in eighteen months.” Then divide the dollar amount by the number of months to figure out your monthly goals.

2. Know your income

Before you can establish a budget, you have to know exactly how much money you have coming in every month from your employer and other sources. Make sure to include only the money you actually receive (for example, the exact amount of your paycheck rather than your gross pay).

3. Total your monthly expenses

You’ll need to know how much money you’re spending every month. When figuring out your total monthly expenses, be sure to include groceries, rent or mortgages, all debt payments (including car loans, student loans, and credit cards), cell phone service, cable and entertainment. Remember to include occasional expenses, like doctor visits and car insurance. Look through bank and credit card statements to get a realistic picture of your spending.

4. Create a realistic budget

To make your fist stab at a budget, add your monthly expenses from Step 3 to the monthly goals you calculated in Step 1, then subtract that total from your monthly income. If the balance is positive, you’ve created a budget that is compatible with your current lifestyle. If the balance is negative, take another look at your goals, expenses and income.

5. Revisit your goals and expenses

If the first draft of your budget came out negative, rework the numbers and try again. Think about what areas you may be able to alter in order to create a budget that’s manageable and still fits your needs. For example, you can revisit your expenses, and decide which are priority items that need to stay in your budget and which you can do without. You can consider changing the amount of time or money needed to meet your goals. Or you can figure out a way to increase your income. Any one of those changes could make your budget come together.

 

Tips for Single Mom : Save Money

This is a simple but often overlooked, way to keep track of what you’re spending. It does take some time and patience – and a calculator – but getting into the habit of balancing your checkbook every month will help you be more responsible for your day-to-day spending.

Yes I to be a single mom it was so easy. I know a year back then before I starting this blog make me down. I always cry when saw a couple picture show their happiness. Sometime I wonder to myself that “When I can have that romantic moment too?” so sad, I know, but so bite it lah. I can do have a romantic moment too (someday), but now because I still don’t know when I can have that moment, first thing to do that I have to saving my money for myself and also his future.

• Check your financial and collect all assets

Now it’s time we recalculate how many assets we have, such as homes, vehicles, jewelry, and other assets, which have cash value or can be cashed. If the spouse dies, then surely there is life insurance that can be availed by the heirs in question.

Collect the value of the insurance along with other assets so that we can measure the total amount of assets or assets owned.

• Make a list of payables or financial obligations to be paid

By listing the financial obligations to be paid, we can plan payments for those obligations in accordance with the assets held, at least for a period of several months before the financial condition recovers.

• Create a priority scale for spending

Perhaps for some time the family’s financial condition is unstable. In these times, expenditure should be prioritized for monthly payments, such as electricity, water, environmental security, school fees, and so on.

Put aside the less important expenses, such as buying clothes, accessories, eating out, and so on. Realize that the income or income earned is not as much as before, so we should be more careful removing it.

• Dig potential things on you for finding new income

It is not easy to become a single mom, in addition to being the only backbone in the family in the affairs of making a living, also must educate and take care of the family.

Just like any other family, single mom should be able to allocate and prepare income for everyday life, sudden expenses, and long-term expenditure. For this it takes more creative energy and thought to seek additional income.

No need to think too much about the types of businesses that can be used to find additional income, digest the potential within and maximize. Going through a business or business that starts from the passion will feel easier and enjoy, so the burden as a single mom will be slightly reduced.

• Open about financial issues with your children

The child is the most important figure in a sudden change of family atmosphere, so his feelings should not be ruled out. If the child’s age has been felt enough to understand the condition of his parents, invite them to talk from heart to heart, especially in family finances. Most likely there are things that used to be done, but now can not be done anymore. If the child is too young to understand the financial condition that must be faced, begin teaching the child to save if you have the desire to have something.

Thus, the child will learn to set the priority scale of his desire, at least starting from the simple things. In addition, the mother can control the situation without having to make the child feel depressed.

• Don’t give up!

It is not easy to manage the financial post after being left by the couple, especially if you do not have enough financial preparation. However, rest assured slowly the finances will improve if we want to keep trying and of course with the full support of children and families.

So don’t give up! You can make it honey!

Single Mom Traveling with Baby : Bali

If you are single Mom, don’t be afraid to traveling with your babies. Plus, don’t be worry about your financial problem, your earnings already set up by God!

Why I said this problem, because God never gives a trial of difficulty beyond the ability of his people. For me, I keep this words, and finally could flew me away to enjoying vacation with my baby to Bali a year ago.

I came to Bali where the best marathon in Indonesia –  Maybank Bali Marathon 2017 was been held. At that time Oru just 4 months and he is so tiny for his first journey use plane. For this mater I discuss with his doctor first before we going to Bali and here a tips for you a single Mom who have a plan to travel with your babies:

1. Consultation with a doctor

If you have a first time for your babies traveling with airplane, don’t forget to meet your doctor first. Get consultation first about your babies health and conditions, is it he well flew or not.

The doctor will suggest minimum age traveling with babies around 3 months, less than that it might be need approval from the doctor and also the airlines company you traveling with.

2. Wear ear protector to cover up your babies ears and also a lot of milk near him

If you really want to plan traveling with babies, make sure a lot of researching to see the details where airlines allowing infant age. For some airlines they just allowing three months old to enjoying flying with them.

When I go to Bali, we used Airasia who had night flight. Because we have night flight it easy for Oru enjoying his first trip in the air with his ear protection and also a lot of milk, the baby sleep well and also not fussy.

Why this is important to wearing ear protection and give baby a lot of milk, because they don’t know how to adjust with air in the altitude, if you not prepare for this they might be fussy and cry a lot because hurt on they ears.

For ears protection, may I suggest that better you buy the used and with a good condition one, rather than buy the new one. Because if you not traveling a lot it could be wasted, your babies will grow up and when they attain the age of 7 moths they really heated to wearing ear protection, because can’t drink milk well when you breastfeed him.

3. Bring a light cloths for you, but well prepare for your babies

If you know where you want to go, please make sure to fit in.

If you traveling to Bali, of course you know the heat there so you might be comfortable if wearing a light cloths. Because I wearing hijab, I prefer to wearing a dress and light hijab.

Bring boyfriend jeans to make your move easy, because if you wearing a tight jeans make your walk not comfortable, but boyfriend have good air circulation. Because you carry your baby almost on your trip this jeans would make you easy to move.

Please forget about over to much bring a cloths for you, come on honey this is your moment with your baby not a moment you looking a new guy. aahaha…

For a babies, if you stay for 4 days bring 8 cloths. Double up carrier for babies is a must, even he wearing a diapers, but the heat make them sweat easily. I suggest bring up a lot of jumper for a day and jumper for a sleep, it might your suitcase easy to breath and the rest on it you can full it with a souvenir from Bali. Yeay…!

4. Don’t bring your stroller, but use baby carrier for easy move

Do you plan traveling with stroller? Sorry honey that’s useless. Because a lot of street in Bali not familiar with stoller and the heat in the beach area could make your babies not comfortable.

Just bring your lovely baby carrier, carry him around you and when he get overheating comfort him with some fan or stop at a restaurant or shop for shelter.

5. Booking your hotel online and near airport

Lesson number one traveling with baby: you must well prepare for your travel list. Research a good hotel and also nearby airport make you easily when landed and back to your hometown.

Because traveling with a babies could make a lot of difficulty, don’t make it ruin your flight time because you woke up late or got traffic jam.

Try to booked your hotel by Agoda or Booking.com this site really trusted for your traveling plan. But if you doubt for the fancy marketing photo you can use Google or Tripadvisor to see the real review about your hotel.

Please choose a better hotel, not budgeting one but something with minimum 3 stars on it, because the hotel have to make your babies comfortable while in Bali.

6. Make a travel list, where area you want to travel with, but don’t go to extreme activity ya, because you bring your babies and not traveling with friends

If you go to Bali, first things to do traveling to Kuta Beach, but don’t takes to long because your babies need a cool things after their journey in the beach.

After that bring him to Garuda Wisnu Kencana (GWK). In here, they might be see a entertainment from Balinese Dancer, and they really happy when saw they performance.

If you don’t like a hot weather in Bali, just go to north (Ubud) where the heat more coolest and your babies will comfortable with. But it might be a little bit costly because on those area especially for rich people to come.

For buying a souvenir, just have a shopping at night at Krisna. Maybe this is would be a little expensive, but if you shop at a street market, your babies will be overheat and I don’t like it.

7. Don’t traveling alone, just ask your mom to accompany with

I know you might be hated when I suggesting this things. But to be honest traveling with your Mom is the best to get closer with.

Because you been busy at work and entrust the child to your Mother, your vacation means that her vacation too. She deserve to have fun with. If not you, who else will make her happy?

Start Your Impossible!

A couple week I just got this amazing advertising from Toyota. Within a hashtag #StartYourImpossible make me realize. The global corporate initiative aims to inspire Toyota employees, partners, and customers and connect them with the company’s core beliefs. In an age of accelerating technological and environmental developments, “Start Your Impossible” marks Toyota’s commitment to support the creation of a more inclusive and sustainable society in which everyone can challenge their impossible.

Why I am so gloomy? Why I am not start my impossible things happens. Maybe hard, but it would to try and never doubt for the reason.

Move is Human Right! Because when we start to move, anything could be possible!

That’s quote just remind me that anything you afraid about, it always haunted you. Start be positive about who you are, and always believe that you can make it.

My plan for this year is number one are being a good mom for Oru, but beside of that I also have my goals to achieve! I have to reduce my weight like before 45kg. I know it sound be a silly, but like Toyota advertising magic words, “Start Your Impossible”. Still long way to go…!

 

Drink Coffee While Pregnant?

Drink Coffee While Pregnant? It is save!

While I was pregnant of Oru, almost everyday I drink my coffee without any absence. The good things drink my coffee every morning is make my mood when pregnant became a awesome, but a later on I got my preeclampsia.

A study from The New Journal of Medicine found the fact that miscarriages can happen because of too much coffee. It was found in 562 pregnant women who became survey participants. Caffeine content in coffee is also suspected as a cause of miscarriage.

The reason, this study shows that women who are pregnant have a higher risk of miscarriage when drinking more than 8 cups of coffee per day. This applies to coffee commonly purchased at supermarkets or in cafes in general.

Why is drinking coffee when pregnant is very dangerous? Coffee with caffeine can enter and penetrate the baby’s placenta. In normal people alone, caffeine can speed up the heartbeat and this also has the same effect on the fetal heart. Then, what is the ideal size or dose of coffee during pregnancy?

When pregnant, there are some foods and drinks that should be limited intake. All foods and beverages that contain caffeine, tea, chocolate, soft drinks, energy drinks are beverages whose limits must be considered in pregnant women. Check and read the packaging information instructions carefully before pregnant women consume them.

Babycenter recommends a maximum of 200 mg of caffeine if you want to drink coffee while pregnant. This is equivalent to two cups of instant coffee for a day.

It can also be tailored to the packaging instructions on the food and beverage you will eat. Here’s an example of the instructions:

• 80 mg of caffeine is equivalent to a come from energy drink.
• 140 mg of caffeine is equivalent to a cup of filtered coffee.
• 60-80 mg of caffeine equals a cup of instant coffee.
• 40 mg of caffeine is contained in a bottle of soda.
• 10-50 mg of caffeine is found in a cup of tea.
• 50g chocolate usually contains 25-50 mg of caffeine.

Drinking coffee during pregnancy is not prohibited, but note the intake of caffeine into the body. For that, consider the content of caffeine in tea, coffee, chocolate and other foods listed on the packaging.

Do not let caffeine consumption exceed the tolerance limit for pregnant women. If you are accustomed to consuming more than two cups of coffee per day before pregnancy, you can switch to other types of drinks that certainly do not contain the risk of caffeine and healthier for both you and the fetus. It is recommended to reduce coffee intake during pregnancy. Expand drinking water and other nutritious foods to maintain the health of mother and fetus.

From that tips, I am kind of regret because while I pregnant can’t stop drinking coffee. But actually my preeclampsia not coming from coffee or caffeine, but because I have a lot of fat inside my body.

I had preeclampsia my body gain weight while pregnant around 30kg. Is because my body contain baby and so much water. Not comfortable, that’s why I recovery and had a good mood with my coffee. My coffee while pregnant and preeclampsia actually not solve the problem, because I can’t walk and also wearing shoes, almost everyday I wearing my slippers go to office (can you imagine, I had meeting with board of director wearing my slippers).

And when I be in labor, my blood pressure 170/110 and completely with low red blood. My doctor who have super relax mood always encourage me to solve this problem, “Is ok Una everything will be alright”. That’s advice not always make me relax, but helpful a lot, thanks my best obgyn doctor dr FX A. Bhimantoro SpOg. Thanks because always make me believe that my pregnancy is blessed and bring a lot of miracle in my life. Alhamdulillah.

Btw, back to coffee. My suggestion while you are pregnant and ugly mood, please don’t ever think that drink coffee would change your mood be a good one. No! I am not suggest you drink a coffee while pregnant. Please take care of your caffeine inside your body while you are pregnant. Because, caffeine can’t bring a good things in your body and baby while pregnant, this chemical only make you happy sometime and than have trouble later on.

Come on, you don’t believe it? Honey, you know walking, sleeping, sitting with supper heavy, fluffy body and of course gaining a lot of weight is not comfortable, please avoid to drink a coffee, unless you want to have swell body. But again, everything is back to you. Take it or leave it.

How To Be Happy, While Pregnant and Alone?

How To Be Happy, While Pregnant and Alone?

From my experience, being single while pregnant is super difficult, why yeah as you know you have your body change from size 4 to size 14 not super comfortable.

Beside of that size, you also have struggled to move. If you have someone to accompany you such as your husband, it would be super happy ya, but in my case lucky I have a lot of friends who caring and supporting me.

While I am pregnant of Oru, I have to finishing my Master in International Business. Is not an easy, because in the morning until late afternoon you have done your work at office than later on you still have to go to University until night. Lucky that my campus from office not so far, just walk little bit than arrived and study.

At that time if I have to flashback my feeling, I am totally heart broken, almost can’t stop crying go to office with your motorcycle and once a time some bad person want to steal your bag, while your useless and stupid husband have a wonderful time with his lover and never thinking about you and his baby.

I know that it’s might be look so stupid, why I have to struggle by myself but your husband can’t take care of you. But as you know, I am blessed and always ask God to take care of me and my baby. Six months and I can pass the hard things in my life (including drama at work, internship and thesis).

Alhamdulillah…

Because I always remember that I have my Mom, Dad, Brother and also friends who take care of me, I never even thought my pregnancy was so heavy. I am feel grateful and blessed, than I can passed it and get more happy when Oru arrived into this world.

If you have same condition like me, honey don’t be sad. Look from the big picture, you are not alone! You have to be survive cause your baby need you. You have to be strong and not thinking about something who make you hurt the most. Just thinking about you! you! you! you! Because if you start to think to make your self happy first, your aura and feeling will get aboard to other people’s (especially your baby).

Eat a lot and follow the doctor advice about your pregnancy. Fuck off if you want to avoid to have USG test because you wanna get surprise their gender. Come on, you don’t need to become so selfish like that, when I said just thinking about you! first, is not kind of being selfish and arrogant for your infant development, you need USG test every month to have close with them. If you know that they grow so strong inside your belly, it can be a big driven to you to love a life more.

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage – Lao Tzu.

But this is my feeling to be a mom.

Relationship Mom and her daughter / son is kind of true love. True love that you let your body change because you wanna keep your baby warm and also develop well. True love when you hear her / his first cry on this world make you cry a lot and suddenly want to protect and make  she / him happy forever.